Illusionary Effects
by Harmful Harlot
Summary: Yami thinks Rebecca has a crush on Yugi. Yugi thinks he needs some pills for his visions. Rebecca doesn't know why everyone's talking about earlobes! Puzzleshipping.


Diz: Well, here's my first entry and it's... Puzzleshipping! X3 As some of you know, I'm no novice to this pairing, so let's see if I lost my touch. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Standard disclaimer applies. I own nothing, but the computer I'm writing this on, the plot I wrote, and my mind. X3

Illusionary Effects  
Puzzleshipping ( Yami no Yugi x Yugi Mutuo )  
Authoress: Dizzy Loser

"You're far too serious for your own good, you know that?" The sweet scent of strawberries drifted past Yami no Yugi's nose as Yugi Mutuo leaned his face closer to Yami's, as to peck him on the lips.

"I'm serious when the time comes and I have to say, this is one of those times." Yami's deep voice vibrated off the walls, reaching Yugi's ears. "This is getting ridiculous, don't you think?"

"No, I really don't." Yugi responded, frowning. "It's a silly little crush. She won't have it for very much longer."

"She's had it for over two years. She's clung to this... this... fantasy that you're going to suddenly appear next to her in a 16th century nobleman's outfit and sweep her off her feet and then go galloping off into the sunset where you'll live happily ever after." Yami's voice was thick with irritation. "Enough is enough. It's finally time for you to tell her that you'll never think of her that way."

"Have you met her?" Yugi asked, his wide amethyst eyes staring at Yami in incredulity. "What exactly would you have me say? 'Pardon me, Rebecca, may I have a word? Yes, well, the thing is, I don't like you romantically. Truth be told, I'm actually gay and dating Yami. Well, have a nice life'? Get real."

"Oh, yes, by all means, tell her you're with me so she can come at me with an axe. Yes, I've always wanted a short midget with a superiority complex to come swinging sharp things at my head." Yami closed his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Well, what would you have me tell her?" Yugi glared at Yami, debating whether or not he should throw a pillow at the pharaoh.

"Tell her you don't like her." Yami simply shrugged. Yugi resisted the urge to roll his eyes.

"She'll be so heart broken, though." Yugi pointed out, his eyes taking on a soft, caring look.

"Not if it's just a crush. Just try it, Yugi. You'll be surprised at how things turn out." Yami told him, pulling the shorter boy into a hug.

"Maybe..." Yugi trailed off, hugging Yami back.

----

"Rebecca, may I have a word?" Yugi walked up to the short girl who was grinning at him and clutching her bear.

"Always." Rebecca responded, pushing her glasses up with her index finger. "What do you need?"

"Err..." Yugi started to say what he had come to say - "Sorry, Rebecca. It would never work out." - but he looked into Rebecca's eyes and imagined them completely filled with tears, tears he caused... "I just wanted to tell you that I liked your shoes. Yup. Your shoes are mighty nice and I like them. Well... See ya!" With that, Yugi ran off without another word.

"Um..." Rebecca looked down to see the horrid, orange tennis shoes that her grandfather tricked her into buying. "Yugi seriously likes these ugly things?"

Rebecca shook her head and walked the opposite way that Yugi went.

----

"So, what you're saying is... you didn't do it." Yami stated blandly, his face completely blank.

"Err... pretty much, yeah." Yugi smiled nervously, rubbing the back of his head. "I just didn't want to see her sad!"

"She might not be sad, Yugi." Yami told him, shaking his head.

"Well... I guess I can try it again." Yugi finally said, sighing.

"Please do." Yami said, leaning back onto the bed to finish the book he had started.

----

"Hey, Rebecca!" Yugi called, running to catch up with the fast-paced girl. "May I speak with you?"

"Sure." Rebecca shrugged, stopping her walk to turn and face Yugi.

"Well, the thing is..." Yugi began but stopped when he noticed Rebecca fiddling with her hands. Her hands were moving rather fast. What if Yami was right? What if she wasn't sad? What if she was - Here, Yugi gulped- angry. What if she pulled a weapon out from behind her back and slashed him to pieces the minute he told her? "Your yellow sweater is absolutely gorgeous." Yugi told her, smiling nervously and running away, glancing behind him every so often until he was out of sight.

"Is he serious?" Rebecca frowned at the yellow sweater that was splattered with ducks. "He...has... the worst taste in fashion I've ever seen."

----

"Strike two." Yami groaned, letting the book above his head fall from his hands onto his face. "What happened now, Yugi?"

"I started to tell her, I really did! I just... I wondered if maybe you were right. And then I got this... this vision of Rebecca chopping me into tiny little Yugi pieces because she was angry with me!" Yugi's eyes were small, but wide.

"You think Rebecca would chop you up? Get a grip on yourself. This is Rebecca. She wouldn't chop you up." Yami sighed and picked the book up off his face. "Go back. Try it again. Try not to have any visions. Run away if she reaches behind her back."

Yugi frowned and stomped out the door, slamming the door shut.

----

"Rebecca!" Yugi stopped his walk right in front of Rebecca, successfully stopping her from continuing her walk.

"What now, Yugi?" Rebecca looked at him, hands on her hips.

"I need to tell you that..." This time, Yugi really couldn't help it. The vision just flashed before him. In the vision, she wasn't mad nor was she sad. She had a crazed look in her eye and all of the sudden, she leapt around Yugi before pouncing him and tearing his earlobe off. "Sweet Kami..."

"What was that?" Rebecca frowned, leaning into hear him better.

"Err... nothing!" Yugi backed up slowly, reaching up to hold both his earlobes in his hands. "I just... like your skirt. Quite nifty!" And Yugi took off again, not once looking back.

"What's his problem?" Rebecca looked down at her outfit, frowning in disgust. "I choose to wear the ugliest things in the history of the world today and all of the sudden he compliments me?"

----

"Are you serious?" Yugi nodded shakily to Yami's deadly question. "You... didn't... do it. That's strike three."

"Err... So, what are you going to do?" Yugi timidly asked.

"I'm going to go tell her myself." Yami responded, causing Yugi's eyes to widen considerably. "I'll be back soon." Yami walked out the door and down the stairs, not pausing at all.

"No! Wait! Stop! Come back! Atleast keep her away from your earlobes!" Yugi shouted after him, chasing him.

----

"Rebecca, I need to speak with you."

"What now?" Rebecca groaned, turning around to face... Yami. "Oh. It's you. What do you want?"

"I need to speak with you about your little crush on Yugi." Yami started.

"My little crush on Yugi? I-"

"Now please don't interrupt. I must be heard. He has not, does not, and will not like you romantically. I'm sorry for this, but you'll get over it soon. In fact, the reason I know Yugi doesn't like you in that way is because he's gay. And he's dating me. This may come as a bit of a shock, but-"

"I know." Rebecca told him, nodding.

"You... what?" Yami blinked, scratching his head with his index finger.

"I figured that, to have the... fashion taste he has, he has to be gay. I had no idea he was dating you, though." Rebecca trailed off, thoughtfully.

"You mean, you don't have a crush on him? But, what about the looks you give him? The smiles?" Yami looked at her incredulously, trying to figure this out.

"I give everyone the same look equally. And I smile because he's a funny guy. Is that so hard to understand? I outgrew my crush on him, silly." Rebecca grinned.

"Oh, I see. Wait a minute, are you telling me that gay guys have bad fashion sense? Isn't it supposed to be gay guys have better fashion sense than some women?" Yami smirked at her.

"That's not what Mr. Bear told me." Rebecca shook her head. Yami sighed and started to say something before he was interrupted.

"Don't touch his earlobe!" Yugi came screaming, his face red from running.

"Earlobe? What?" Rebecca looked at Yami curiously. "Why would I touch his earlobe?"

"He's being insane." Yami grinned, reaching out to pull Yugi into a soft kiss. Yugi was the first to break contact, his face red for a whole new reason.

"I take it she took it well, then?" Yugi glanced over at Rebecca to see her shaking her head.

"That she did." Yami replied, pulling Yugi into another kiss.

"Gross! Do that some place else, guys, really!" Rebecca whined, covering Mr. Bear's eyes and slamming her eyes shut. Yami broke the kiss, smiling.

"Alright. Wouldn't want her to tear my earlobe off, hm?" Yami teased, watching Yugi's face glow from embarassment.

"Earlobe? What is it with the earlobe!?" Rebecca ground out.

"Not a thing. See you later!" Yugi smiled, pulling Yami away from Rebecca to walk home, both of their earlobes in tact.

Owari

Diz: There you have it. My first story for the third season of Compy's contest. Hope you all enjoyed. X3 Please read and review, ne?


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